Snot Potatoes, or The Origin of My Eating Disorder

Okay, this probably isn't really the origin of my eating disorder. The origin of my unhealthy relationship is probably actually that I was a slightly chubby kid who was constantly harassed and called "that fat girl." In elementary school, kids were supposed to bring treats for the whole class on their birthdays. One kid brought in red rope licorice for his birthday. Red rope licorice is pretty awesome. So I was excited, and was just noming on my red rope licorice, being all happy. And the jerks in my class made fun of me for eating the same thing the rest of them were eating! "Wow, fatty, eat much?" Yes. Yes, I do. Suck it. At another point, I think in fifth grade, we were watching some meat propaganda film. If you recall from my previous blog, I have always loved animals and from second grade through high school would not consume any meat. I still don't eat red meat. So, this propaganda film informed us that "If you didn't eat meat, you'd be as thin as a sheet of paper." I rolled my eyes at this, and announced to the kids at my table, "I don't eat meat." And the little bastard next to me responded with "Then why are you so fat?" Gee, I can't imagine why I might have issues with food. For several years, I would not eat anything in front of anybody. I dropped to an unhealthy weight in high school and through most of college. Since, I've gone to the other extreme and am clinically overweight. It's still insanely difficult for me to eat in the presence of somebody I don't know well. I mean, I can go to restaurants, but for example, I went to dinner with an old workmate and his wife. They're great and I adore them, but going to dinner with them was a huge source of anxiety for me.

However, it's more amusing for me to blame my food issues on Snot Potatoes, so I'll go with that. When I was a kid, hot lunch was different than it is now. I don't think the FDA even existed when I was kid (this may be an exaggeration). Nutritional requirements? No. So once a week, hot lunch was turkey and mashed potatoes with gravy in elementary school. All of the kids loved mashed potato day. Including me, cause yay, carbs! Well, my sister told me that the slightly yellow-ish gravy on the mashed potatoes was snot. So I never ate those again. I still associate turkey and chicken gravy with disgustingness. So, thanks for that, Sis.